Life is Now, Not 2morow, Not Yesteday

cliche?

u bet, but how many ppl can actually do dat? sooner or later, responsibility and uncertaity of 2morow kicks in.

u might wonder wats with all the recent melancholy entries? truth is, i'm not so sure myself.. might have been the weather, might be becuz i'm in a phase. wat ever it is, it made me see something. somethin else.

i've been playing/coaching my mix basketball team. and just now, i realize some of the mistake i've been makin as a coach, all the time i'm thinking of pushing my team, to push them and to squeeze out of them wat ever i can. to bring out the best in ppl. i thought i was doin wats good for them and my team, wat a silly dumb ass i am. i've fall for the rookie mistake of believin in the good nature of human being. of all ppl, i should've know wats in the festering depth of human soul.

some ppl just can't be dealt with dat way, wat i have been doin so far only works on ppl who are able, keen, young and naive. or determined. it doesn't work on seasoned professionals who live their life from one high to another. not too bad a way to live life i must say, its like living life through a gigantic drug induced roller-coaster.

anyway, dat is a little bit beside my point. now i've thought about it, its more about how to give them tools to enhance their abilities. much like our stone age fore-fathers. see, the nature of the beast has not changed through thousands of years of evolution. and may never be. all u can really do is just give them a sharpened wood and hope like hell they'll bring back the bacon.

"i will find u rathaman !!", upon which the reply was " i will destroy u first!"

one of the things about 80's cartoon dialog is dat nobody seems to notice these stupid come backs by the bad guys. mayb that's y the heroes of those cartoon always have a chance not because they are heroic but because the bad guys are just too dumb...

not sure if anybody still remembers conan the adventurer? its basically conan the barbarian, fighting against these snake men, except these snake men are disguised as human, so how do u know they are in fact, snake men? hmm? well, other than the fact that these snake men wear the same uniform even when they are still disguised as humans, conan also has a sword which can reveal their true forms, but there's one catch to this mighty useful sword, it can't actually kill any of these snake men! all it can do is send them to another dimension. so u dont actually get the satisfaction of revenge but u do have to worry about these bad guys having a comback if the series proves to be profitable and the tv executives decided to milk it for a few more seasons of it.

our lives are so short.

i'm in my mid-20's and already, i feel as if a huge part of my life has already slipped away from me, i was a slave in every part of my life up to this point, i did everything i did to survive, wether it be socially or financially. now when i finally decide to live my life and suddenly i dont even know where to start. i am now trapped in a path of constantly having to move forward as a professional, because everything i did up to now is to make sure that i will keep on moving forward in this path. so in layman's term i have pretty much dug a hole for myself and more importantly, the hole is starting to collapse as well.

there is no end to this path, holidays and weekend are just a diversion to numb the pain, while every day i kill myself slowly with my own fear and in-decisiveness. is this fate? and is dis how we fight our fate? by correcting our own mistakes? i can't help but wonder........